{Photography by Teri H Hoover}
My story’s a little different from most other “I quit my day job” stories. I didn’t have an awful boss—in fact, she was amazing and inspirational. I didn’t work in a small cubicle. And, I actually liked my job.
I counseled at-risk adolescents and their families, and I ran groups for teens who struggled with substance abuse. I loved that I got a chance to make a difference in the life of multiple teens on a daily basis.
One of the hardest decisions I’ve made was to end my career as a therapist.
You might be wondering why I’d leave a job that I liked. You know how things that you like and enjoy aren’t always good for you? Margaritas, pizza, reality television, staying in your pajamas all day.
Well, my career was kinda like drinking margaritas and eating pizza every day. I liked it, but my body didn’t. I was constantly sick, suffering from tension headaches, and living off of Diet Coke for energy. I couldn’t shut off my “therapist self” when I was at home, so my life was consumed with worry.
When I walked into my office each morning, the blinking red light on the telephone taunted me. I never wanted to check my messages, because I was afraid that one of the teens that I truly cared about was hurt, ran away in the middle of the night, was involved in gang violence, or worse.
Pushed to Change
I wouldn’t have left that job if I didn’t have to leave. My husband (Kris) and I decided that we wanted to move back to Virginia after living in Brooklyn for about 5 years. We wanted to be closer to our family and friends, and we both missed Virginia. We’d both had enough of long subway rides, small apartments, and horrible landlords.
Law students start applying for jobs about a year before they graduate from law school, so Kris applied to jobs in areas of Virginia that we wanted to live. He got an offer from a law firm in Blacksburg. There wasn’t much to discuss. Our dreams of moving back to Virginia were coming true.
But, it meant that I’d have to leave my stable job that I’d worked really hard to secure. Luckily, we had months to plan our next steps.
The Dreams I Didn’t Know I Had
While I worked as a therapist, I got up every morning at 5am to blog, write fiction, and work on other creative projects. I thought of this as a hobby that could never pay the bills. Growing up, my dad always told me that I needed a realistic career. He even frowned upon me working as a therapist. He thought I’d have more stability if I pursued teaching. I don’t blame him for it. He wanted me to be self-sufficient and happy, and he thought that would be the best path.
I suffered from small thinking like so many other creatives. I thought that the story of the poor, starving artist was the truth—that it was a life of instability and suffering. I never realized that I could create my own reality—that I could actually pursue my creative passions and make money.
While we lived in Brooklyn, my husband and I would take daily walks down by the water with the Statue of Liberty in the distance. Sometimes, I’d bring up my creative dreams. “What if I could make a living writing? What if I could sell mixed media art? What if…What if…What if…?” Thankfully, my husband supported all these dreams, encouraging me to try them out.
The Not-So-Sexy Part of Quitting Your Day Job
Even though my husband had already secured a job, he still had to take the bar exam. This meant we’d leave Brooklyn in May and move in with my parents in Richmond, VA for three months while he took bar exam classes. This meant we’d be without a steady income for three months. We’d have to do a lot of planning.
We were also in the midst of planning our wedding that was only 5 months away. Thankfully, we’d already saved all the money for our wedding plus some. We determined how much money we’d need for those three months, and we budgeted. We didn’t do any extra spending. Anything that was a “want” instead of “need” got cut. Goodbye pretty sundress, goodbye summer sandals, goodbye movie dates, goodbye eating out.
I also said goodbye to my benefits including health insurance. What we didn’t know at the time was that I wouldn’t qualify for private health insurance, because I have a history of back problems. We knew that we’d eventually get health insurance through Kris’ employer, but we didn’t know how long that would take. We took a big risk.
Unfortunately, a week before our wedding, I got really sick and had to be hospitalized for five days. A few months later, we received the hospital bill that no one without health insurance wants to receive. Hello $20,000 in medical debt.
Why am I sharing all this? Because, I want you to know that’s not all easy. It’s not all pretty. Sometimes, it sucks.
I can’t tell you how many times I hear, “You’re so lucky. I wish I could do that,” when I tell people what I do.
I believe I am lucky. I spend my entire day doing what I love to do. I’ve finally found the thing that lights me up inside. But, it was a hard journey to get here. We had to do a lot of financial planning and saving. We had to make a lot of sacrifices. And, I had to work a lot of long days and weekends.
But, I wouldn’t do it differently. Well, maybe I’d take away that $20,000 medical bill! But everything else would stay the same.
The Oh-So-Sexy Part of Quitting Your Day Job
Obviously, it’s not all bad. In fact, most of it’s good. I’ve been free from my day job for a year and a half, and I can’t imagine going back.
My stress level has dramatically decreased. And, what stress I do have comes from the pressure that I put on myself.
I can work the hours that I want to work. If I want to take a two hour lunch break to exercise, shower, and eat, I can. If I want to work in the evening instead of the morning, I can. If I want to take a 30 minute break to enjoy the sunshine and play with my dogs, I can.
I decide what tasks I want to prioritize and how I want to fill my day.
If I see something that needs to be changed, I can change it automatically without getting permission from someone above me. For instance, I recently realized that I was spending too much time on “small” tasks—tasks that don’t help my readers, customers, and clients. Things like tweaking my website. So, I made a switch to spending most of my time on “big” tasks like working on a free blogging ecourse and putting together creative tutorials.
I get to create something new every day.
I don’t live for Fridays or vacations.
I wake up each morning excited to work, and I go to bed most nights feeling satisfied.
I’m happy.
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I absolutely love the idea behind this post as well as your inspiration. It doesn’t take a bad job to force us to pursue our own passions but rather understanding who we truly are and aligning our work to our life’s purpose.
Fear is always what gets in our way but once you are able to realize that fear is nothing more than our imagination playing tricks on us, there is absolutely nothing standing in our way.
Way to go!
Thanks for stopping by Shannon!
Leaving behind stability was definitely scary, but in the end, it was worth facing that fear. And, like you said, it allowed me to really figure out who I truly am. At the risk of sounding cheesy, that to me was priceless.
What an inspirational story April! I love hearing how people created awesome lives for themselves. I am going to include a link to your article on my Friday Small Business Roundtable.
Thanks Fred. I really appreciate your support!
Hi April!
Thanks for sharing your story! It’s so inspiring that you are making a living with your creative dreams. I know everything is not easy …but keep doing the great work!
Love your post!
Hugs,
Guisela
Hi Guisela!
Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. I appreciate your encouragement!
So inspiring April. I also quit my day job this year + find a lot of motivation + empowerment int he way you write! By believing passionate that “we can”, we REALLY CAN make anything happen + be happy like you say 🙂 It’s possible! It really is!
Hey Mayi! Congrats on quitting your day job!!! And thanks for stopping by to comment.
this is so inspirational! as someone who is dreaming daily about quitting my day job to pursue my passion, your story gives me hope. i can do it!!!
Great information. I found your Blog through Imaginative Bloom and I am so happy now.
Thanks,
Bob
Thanks for sharing your experiences. It’s always good to know that things are not rosy, that we will find problems along the way but with enthusiasm and passion, anything can be overcome. 🙂
HI! Along with everyone’s comments I wanted to say congrats and beautiful story…you may want to look into that writing dream as well! I am TRYING to quite my part time day job ( I am also a mom to a wonderful…but spirited 2 year old son.) so along with the part time job that I work from home, I also raise him and so all the housewife stuff too…cleaning cooking etc, you get the picture. I started an etsy site silverlotusbeads.etsy.com which has taken off and I’m thrilled yet I am finding it so hard to keep up with everything! And on top of it I have been working for months to get my jewelry site up and running. My husband finally agreed to my son going into preschool 2 days a week to help with my stress level but I would love any suggestions on how to balance being creative along side a job and a family. I am WAY overwhelmed! Please help!
Thank you for your inspiration…I hope to be at your point one day!
Hey Darcee,
You’re trying to do WAY too much. I recently responded to a blog post on The Artist’s House, because Angela {the woman behind the lovely blog} asked if she can have it all, and my answer was this:
I think you can have it all–but only if you get help. As women, we tend to want to do it all–myself completely included in this. But, can we seriously keep our houses spotless, run successful businesses, spend quality time with our kids, husbands and friends, and still have time to create? I’ve finally realized that we can, but only if we learn to hire things out.
Think about it. Is your time better spent cleaning your house for a full day every week or making new products? Is your time better spent making new creative products and building relationships with customers or is it better spent taking pictures of your stuff and uploading it onto to Etsy?
Do you think that successful women entrepreneurs do all this stuff? I’d bet money that they don’t. At some point, you have to figure out how to leverage your time. This means deciding what tasks can make you the most money and increase your business success and make you the happiest. All the other stuff, you can find people to do for you.
It’s scary hiring someone–especially, someone to work on your business. But, if you want to have it all, in my opinion it’s the easiest and best solution. Often times we think we can’t afford to hire someone, but when we do, it frees us up to make more than enough money to cover that expense.
I hope that helps!
Hi April!
I just wanted to say THANK YOU! I needed some to tell me that even though I knew it all along. Your so right! as women we try to be everything but it is humanly impossible and just hearing someone outside of friends or family telling me that puts into light. After reading your response I found myself crying, but in a good way, don’t get me wrong! Your kind words and advice are being taken to heart and I am going to try and find someone that could help me even though the thought of handing over some of the control scares me, I want my creative time back 🙂 House keeper here I come….running with arms open…hehehe!
So once again I just want to say thank you for posting your blog and all your advice will certainly be held dearly. Thank you again!
Darcee
No problem Darcee! I’m so glad my response helped you…and let me know how things go 🙂
Hi 🙂
I am so happy to read your information! I started from my etsy boot camp page and have been walking threw your “wisdom” ever scene! I really have enjoyed reading your words, you make me feel like I am right there hang’n with ya! “Thanks for that!”
I too have left my flight paramedic position but I have a bit more “poop” like no support from my husband emotionally. I used to think it was cuz he was just “mean” but 1.5 years to 2 later; I think he just didn’t know how for multiple reasons.
Anny-whoo… it’s nice to hear the “swirling ideas in your head” words you wrote. I need to go look at that calender thing. “Thank you” again! You are an inspiration. 🙂 Inspiration to me, not only from what you said but your written words getting it across to me. 🙂
Dazy
Hey Dazy Jane,
I’m so glad that you found us through the Etsy boot camp!
I’m sorry to hear that your husband isn’t supporting you–that must be really difficult to deal with.
But, I’m glad that you’re going to look into using Google calendar. It’s a great tool that can really help your productivity!
Thank you for your response! I’m new to blogging and talking to people. 🙂 It’s exciting to me. Isn’t that funny coming from the life I left?
I will be learning about this stuff as we go so sorry for any mistakes up front! 🙂 I put you on my “to follow list”. I was wondering about that class you mentioned about blogging? Is that on the net? Please advise.
Thank you again 🙂
DazyJane
Hey DazyJane,
You don’t need to apologize for making mistakes–we all make them and that’s how we learn, right? I know I’ve learned the most from mistakes that I’ve made.
The blogging class will be available in January, so look out for it then!
“Good Morning!” 🙂
That’s for sure! I am better because of my mistakes for sure! 🙂 Are you giving this class?
Good Morning back at ya! Yep, I’m putting the class together. It’s a combination of videos, worksheets, and articles–I’ve been working on it every day for the past month!
Sounds good! I’ll be looking for ya!
Take care 🙂
DazyJane
April, thanks for sharing your story, it’s most interesting.
Pursuing your dreams is worth a lot, but it’s not easy at all, that’s a truth we have to cope with.
I’m planning to leave my day job (though not as stressful as yours was!) in March next year, and there are a lot of things to do and consider before that. But it’s worth it!
Thanks again.
Congrats Yuri!
In my opinion, it’s definitely worth it–but there are days when I think, “Wouldn’t it be nice to have paid sick time?” But, there are much less of those than the days when I think, “I’m super lucky.”
I liked the idea behind your post but found it lacking in information I assumed would be here. You didn’t give any information about how much money you saved, if you wrote a business plan, how you marketed your skills, and how long it took to make a liveable wage. What about the people out there who want to do the same thing and don’t have a husband’s salary to lean on?
Hey Katie,
Thanks for stopping by.
I don’t think how much money I saved is relevant, because that number will be different for each person. If you have a mortgage, kids, pets, car payments, then you obviously need to save more than someone who rents an inexpensive apartment and lives alone. It also depends on how fast you think you’ll be able to start turning a profit, and that’s also different for each person.
If you’ve read through my blog, you’ll see that many of my posts focus on marketing. I don’t think I could have included all of that information in this one post or it would have gone on and on and on. This post was supposed to be my story–not advice on how you can do it. I cover those other things in many of my other posts.
Plus, I never said that I lean on my husband’s salary in this post. I actually started making more money than I did at my day job within months. And, again, even if I did lean on my husband’s salary, that would be my story–which I was trying to tell in this post.
I definitely think it’s important to help people with all different situations–but this post wasn’t supposed to be about that.
hey great story! so brave of you to take that step that so many of us fear! I am currently working in a health ed position with high school students so I totally understand your whole “why would I want to leave this awesome job?” idea you had when you left your job. it simply is not what I want to do with my life. I have a very specific problem with my story. I got the job over a year ago. It is 100 miles from where I actually want to live (with my gf). I have been doing this commute for the whole time I have been employed. It takes me about 2 and a half hours to get to work because of traffic..so all in all I drive about 5 hours a day. Needless to say I am exhausted, spending so much money on gas and ruining my car. I have virtually no time to myself. Also, the amount I am spending on gas, car, etc. is what I would spend on an apartment ( I havent had a place to call my own in like 3 years, also a huge source of instability and stress for me). Needless to say, even if I wanted to plan to leave financially it would be very difficult because I honestly barely even live paycheck to paycheck. I am enrolled in architecture classes in the city i want to live in, which to me is my creative dream come true. I am not eligible for any financial aid and there are virtually no jobs in this city. I feel stuck. All I want is to live a couple of blocks from the girlfriend, take architecture classes and make enough money to pay rent/eat/ and occassionaly do something fun. I dont even care about benefits at this point! My work noticed that I had been struggling a bit and all they are doing is being more flexible about me staying in classes, promising me higher positions in the organization in the near future. They are making it very hard to leave! but gah the commute the commute. I guess I could live far from my girlfriend and not see her every night but we are very close and at a point in our lives/relationship where things are very serious. anyways, more of a rant than anything, any tips?
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Thank you for sharing your experience! It means a lot for us trying to do the same! 🙂